Saturday 13 April 2013

Dear Kim Jong-un

I guess you expect us to be trembling in our boots given your war mongering rhetoric and threats to fire nuclear missiles at anything that moves.

But.........

Someone has got to hold their head above the parapet and tell you that you are acting like a right goose, you mad little egotist, you.

For starters, let's take your squeaky propaganda machine and all those photos and videos you keep releasing of your very powerful army.

Honestly Kim, I'm not sure your PR campaign is really working for you. I am trembling and crying alright - from laughing so hard.

(Readers you may need to turn the sound down as the commentary is something to behold and migraine worthy).



Ninja soldiers? Really? In a performance that rivals any self respecting high school acrobatic team you've got fly kicks, left-right jab combinations, body flips, tuck and rolls, and, of course, leap frogging.

It is difficult to tell whether your soldiers are training for hand-to-hand combat or the national cheer leading championships.

However, I am intrigued by one thing.  How do they keep their hats on while doing those rollovers? Seriously. Clever.


And I was completely gobsmacked when I saw your female soldiers. At least gender equality is alive and well in your neck of the woods because women get to wear those big hats too.

Oh....hang on though....look at their feet....they also get to wear some pretty big heels as well.

I am not sure four inch heels will make them combat ready Kim but they sure do look catwalk ready. Sweet.



Female soldiers patrolling along the banks of the Yalu River, near the North Korean town of Sinuiju opposite the Chinese border city of Dandong.


Anyway, it's all a smokescreen right? While you keep your countrymen starving of food and reality, you've probably gone out and bought yourself some more nukes with borrowed money while growing yourself another chin.

Is that what your temper tantrum is all about little Kimmy? 

The rice crops have failed, you overspent at the nuke factory and now you're desperate for a handout?

Well I hope America and South Korea ignore you and your big brother China teaches you a lesson you won't forget about dummy spits, diplomacy and capitalistic ventures.

And speaking of the latter, I have a money making idea for you.  

Why don't you just drop the bombs (no, not literally) and dance to a different tune. 

You could become the star of your own reality TV show.

It would be comedy gold, truly.

And best of all, it will give you more bang for your buck and become just the hit you're looking for.

Imagine this for a minute, if you will Kim. YOU could become the new Psy.

Psy may be dominating the World right now, putting South Korea on the map for younger generations and making millions along the way, but you could easily knock him off his perch.

And best of all we know how much you love a bit of competition with South Korea.

You already have the Psy(chopath) part down pat, have all the right moves and those girls in uniforms will make better window dressing than they do soldiers (Robert Palmer is no longer around to quibble about conceptual copyright).

And don't worry in the least about a lack of talent. Psy has shown us that talent is totally overrated.

And, when you succeed in knocking little Psy off the front pages of the tabloids, the rest of the World will finally take you more seriously and give you some respect man. You will explode across the World.
 

See, solving World Peace is just too damn easy. Has Hilary's successor been announced yet?
 

41 comments:

  1. Oh Lilly, this is priceless!!!! Could not believe those gals in their heels.

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    1. Well a gals got to look her best you just never know lol

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  2. very unfortunate situation there! Hope things calm down.

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    1. They seemed to have now Christine at least.

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  3. Oh I agree- absolutely priceless! I giggled my way through the whole thing- the heels! Oh my word... seriously? I knew things were "wacky" but that just takes the cake :) Yes- I too pray that the whole thing turns into absolutely nothing for all involved.

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    1. Can you imagine wearing those at all to do anything practical? Lol

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  4. Very creative and funny take on a lousy situation. Love the pictures. Soldiers in high heels...what's up with that??? Awesome that you can lighten up a crazy situation.

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    1. Plenty wrong with that he he. Hope it's all gone away now.

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  5. Those women in HEELS???? LOL! It is all soooo damn crazy....! This guy is a real dangerous nutcase!!!

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  6. I'd hope that his posturing, if it is that, is the result of internal pressure than him just being bat-shit crazy. The country does have some nuclear capability, and I can't imagine the results if one went off somewhere. China seems to be the only hope.

    It's hard to digest that in this time there can still be leaders like this; we've had real loonies running countries in history, but now what they say is instantly broadcast the world over.

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    1. Bat shit crazy - oh how I love that expression. So true, social media puts the spotlight on everyone more quickly now. Loonies always existed but now we get to see them up close. Not pretty.

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  7. I read one report in our papers here that the citizens of Seoul are not very worried. I guess if they are not too concerned being so close then the rest of us don't need to be. A nuke going off anywhere (ocean, shot down) would be a mess of radioactive pollution. I just hope this idiot doesn't accidentally make a mess. Did you hear of the Dennis Rodman North Korean visit? He was one of strangest basketball players ever.

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    1. Hey Bill, yes I have seen that Dennis Rodman years ago in the news when he was dating Madonna I think. Oh dear, that is right he just went on a visit to North Korea. What is he being used as some kind of messenger between NK and the USA? Too strange....

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  8. Heeeeeee heeeeeeeeee just hilarious. Horrific though to think he is control of a country and millions of people. He was educated in the UK too which may explain a few things like those dance moves.

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    1. I think he was educated in Sweden or Switzerland for a couple of years only and then just disappeared from the school. Shame.

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  9. Lilly I am more than hoping that Kim Jong Un is all bluff and blunder and hot air and that China will be able to keep him under control.
    Peggy

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    1. Me too Peggy. It seems to have died down somewhat so perhaps someone gave him something to quieten him down. And I don't mean a sedative, lol.

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  10. Crazies like that are dangerous because they are so irrational and truly believe their own p.r.
    It may seem silly to us, except the propaganda has them all drinking the same kool-aid of belief.
    I do think he's going to make a nuclear radioactive mess somewhere. His life and the lives of those in his country are meaningless to him except for his own deluded visions of glory.

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    1. Psychopath. Except in his case I think he is more the puppet for others. They fattened him up, cut his hair so that he would resemble his grandfather moreso. The population loved his grand father apparently and you have to keep the population a little onside even if you are a dictator it seems.

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  11. I guess he doesn't realize that everyone is thinking what an infantile idiot he is. I would laugh if it weren't for the fact that he does have that missile. I just hope we don't cave in and give him what he's obviously wanting.... money and attention.

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    1. No I guess he doesn't care either perhaps Kay. I think he has got both the money and the attention he needed now. Plus his own country men and women probably see him as a hero by now and under the thumb again.

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  12. Oh its a big ask for Kim to do that. Psys new music video has hit 10 million views in 24 hours. I notice Kims has only attracted a few thousand. They do somehow look alike though...

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    1. Tell me you do not like that Psy like millions of others lol.

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  13. One is Ghangham style and the other is Gangster Style and there lies the difference I am afraid, lol

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  14. Great post, Lilly! Funny, and on the spot.

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  15. Unfortunately it's a game for the big boys... heard last night on the box that during the Korean war, China lost 500,000 soldiers. That was a USA vs China war.

    Now, it's replay, albeit with higher stakes.

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  16. 10 years ago, the US & UK - backed by Australia- invaded Iraq. The reason given was the country had weapons of mass destruction and a dictator who threatened world peace. Now we have North Korea. No word of an invasion as yet - but, then, there's no oil in North Korea...

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    1. And we have given them all their weapons I believe. It is a game of Chess and the rules are not known it seems. They make it up as they go along depending on who they are fighting with that particular week. I think if we really knew we would probably blow ourselves up at the inhumanity of it all Mike. Sometimes I do not want to know the truth about it all.

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  17. That video is surreal. And why in the world would they put the female soldier in heels? That's just absurd.

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  18. Ha! I didn't even notice the high heels until you pointed them out. I was too busy laughing at the hats.

    And I laughed when Dennis Rodman (the idiot) went to visit this fool (they make a prefect pair). What could either of them possibly have been thinking.

    xo jj

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  19. Too busy chasing roos to do another post or browse over? Maybe you are busy saving Koala bears. I don't know, is it a zoo there? Just had a minute and thought I would harass you. All the best.

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    1. Yep Bill you got me. I live on Planet X my friend. Its kind of tough coming back to the real world you see......

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  20. I think this is by far the best post yet I've seen on the topic! Hilarious about the high heels and ninja action. Every time I see something on TV showing him, I think to myself, "Looks like a spoiled child" who thinks he has something to prove.

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    1. Yes a two year old and we all know (or you will soon enough) know how terrible their tantrums can be. x

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