Wednesday, 5 September 2012
The things I want to say...but don't..
The older I get people keep telling me I am channelling my grandmother.
Which is great in many, many ways.
Well, all except one perhaps.
To put it bluntly Nana had a really BIG mouth.
No really. She did. There is no sugar coating it.
In fact, she could be really insulting. It got worse the older she became because she was so deaf she compensated by speaking very loudly.
And then there was really no denying what she was saying.
The worst example of this I can give you was when the whole family was gathered for my cousin's wedding. It was held in this beautiful park and all the guests were standing either side of a pathway watching the bride and her father walking by. As the Bride neared us my grandmother lent over to my sister and said in her foghorn voice, "Oh my, hasn't she put on some weight since we last we saw her, I never knew she was that fat."
I just mouthed the words "Alzheimers" to those people who did not know her and who were looking horrified. Thank goodness, the Bride was caught up in her special day and did not seem to hear the insult.
Nanna was a bit weight obsessed come to think of it. I recall one time I was at her house and lying on a rug in front of the open fire. She said, "Don't lie that close, because your fat will melt all over my floor."
That was Nanna. She was just plain rude at times. I don't think she was always that way but over time she just seemed to lose her sensitivity chip.
She said what she thought, when she thought it and didn't appear to much care about the consequences.
So while I am happy to take on some of her more positive virtues I really do not want to be known for her negative traits. So I am trying very hard to keep my mouth firmly shut when I would like to say something negative to people as well.
Instead, I will just blog to the People of the Internet about the things I've wanted to say this week but didn't .........as you do. It's a bit of a shame that Nanna never had a blog really.......
1. Tights are not leggings and leggings are not pants. You seem to have left the house in your what would appear to be see through black tights and top and forgotten to put on your pants or skirt. This is a fashion trend I really do not get.
2. Please stop talking about the latest diet you are on. Seriously it would be fine if it was just the one diet you started and stopped. But in the last 12 months you have waxed lyrical about 100 different diets - the Paleo, Atkins, Zone, Raw Food, South Beach and the Harcombe diets. And unfortunately not followed through on any of them.
3. Yes, the Botox in your forehead looks fantastic. However, it makes the bottom half of your face appear more droopy as though you have had a stroke. The best of both worlds does not always apply.
4. Disability parks are not meant for able bodied people. As I sat there in an ordinary carpark waiting for my sister who is in a wheelchair to finish her appointment, I saw car after car of perfectly able bodied people using the disabled car parks because they were close to the shops. I seriously do not know how people have the nerve to do this as though it does not matter. It matters to the person with a disability not to mention it is illegal.
5. People with a physical disability still have a brain...that works. I was in a pharmacy the other day with my sister who is in a wheelchair. She was asking the pharmacist and an assistant for some advice about something. When they answered her questions they did not address her. They looked at me when they spoke. Even though I had not said a word. It happens all the time. It is almost as though people assume that someone in a wheelchair with a physical disability is deaf, dumb and stupid as well. And she is anything but. I expected more from a health professional.
And just to finish it off on a more positive note, hasn't the Paralympics been spectacular? These athletes are absolutely super human and show us all that we should be focusing on what we can do not what we cannot do. Also, compared to the Olympics, it is such a pleasure to watch athletes who are excited and happy even when they don't get a medal. Thanks again Britain for two great games!!!