Des sees the Light

A few of my long time readers have asked how Des (my father) is doing these days.

Well, he's busy. Really busy.

R-E-A-D-I-N-G. L-O-O-K-I-N-G. W-A-T-C-H-I-N-G. S-E-E-I-N-G



Des has been almost blind for 12 years. But, a couple of weeks ago he had an eye operation.

As there was a chance he would lose his remaining sight he was prepared, after giving it a lot of thought, to face the odds. Although he'd been practicing walking around the house with his eyes closed - just in case.

"So, how did it go?", I asked the morning after the operation.

"It's a miracle", he said. "I'm the only 82 year old I know, besides Hugh Hefner, who went to bed with a brunette and woke up with a blonde."

Yes, it went that well - truth is, Mum has gone decidedly greyer (blonder) in the last 12 years since he 'really saw' her last .... Thank goodness his sense of humour is intact......and hers.

Anyway, he's busy catching up on all the sights. It's quite wonderful watching someone 'really see' again. Sometimes, we don't realise how much we take for granted and I am discovering some things I've been blind to as well.

Have a great week!!

Dear Boss

I am resigning.

You know why I want to resign?

Because since I've worked for you I don't have time to blog any more.
And when I don't have time to blog any more I don't visit any other blogs.
When I don't visit any other blogs my readers think I don't like them any more.
And when my readers think I don't like them anymore they don't visit my blog any more.

When readers don't visit my blog any more my hits drop.
And when my hits drop, it seems to make Blocher unhappy.
When Blocher becomes unhappy, they write to me and I become unhappy
And when I become unhappy, I eat a lot.

When I eat a lot I don't feel like exercising.
And when I don't exercise, I look bad.
When I look bad it affects your company's image.
And when your company's image is affected it affects your business.
When your business is affected it makes you unhappy.

And, we all know that when your'e unhappy, you eat a lot.
When you eat a lot, you get fat.....

You see?

It's a vicious cycle boss .......so I'm sure you can understand.
I am leaving you for your own good.

To the readers who asked me why I'm not writing posts or visiting blogs as much, there is your answer. It's My Boss.
It's just a little unfortunate that I am my own boss.

I am missing blogging as much as I used to - however I am going to visit everyone who has commented in the last two posts this weekend, so you better be ready and have something juicy waiting for me.

Tell me, how much time do you spend on blogging every week do you think? How many posts do you write a week? Anyone got it down to a fine art?

Have a great weekend. We have a beautiful winter's day here (for those who don't know I am in Australia so we have opposite seasons to most of you).

So Many Chemicals in the Air

And they are getting trickier and trickier to balance.

Medications such as Xanax, Demerol (pethedine), OxyContin and now Diprivan are hot media topics since the recent deaths of several celebrities including Michael Jackson.

The fact that people are dying from cocktails of prescribed medications doesn't shock me at all. I think it's far more common than we think. In Australia, about 18 million legal prescriptions are written each year to treat pain, anxiety and sleep disorders. That’s almost one prescription for every Australian.

Even though I hate taking any medication, even vitamin pills, I once had a close relationship with sleeping pills for a short while. It showed me just how easily addiction can take hold.

I was traumatised after leaving a violent relationship. Every time I closed my eyes to go to sleep I would have flashbacks. I was sleep deprived and desperate. I went to a doctor looking for help. In minutes, she prescribed sleeping tablets and antidepressants and sent me on my way.

I threw away the antidepressant prescription and filled the sleeping pill prescription instead.

They worked. So I kept taking them, increasing the dose as I went. After some weeks, I realised I was 'hooked', so I threw the tablets away.

Sleep is often at the hungry heart of the drug beast and it's something to watch out for in those around you.

The doctor had been quick to give me drugs to mask my problem but not so quick to help me deal with the root cause of my pain. While there is a very obvious and legitimate place for prescribed drugs they should never be used as band aid measures for what truly ails us.

I've no idea just how much of the current level of prescriptions handed out is patient driven as opposed to doctor driven . However, it's no surprise that the system that administers to the sick also acts to prop up the sickness of addiction. And like the parallel universe of street dealing, once addicted, the prescription addict has to work hard to find an obliging prescriber.

Many years ago, I discovered my next door neighbour was a pethidine addict. The shame of it all was that she also happened to be looking after my baby daughter while I worked. And of course her problem was something she wouldn't even admit to herself let alone to me.

She was a beautiful woman, with a gorgeous and seemingly happy family. She just had this teensy little problem...that gradually took over her life.

Thank goodness, it didn't take me long to discover her secret.

One day she asked if I would take her to the dentist as she had a toothache. She then said the dentist would not treat her as she had an abscess and she needed to go to a doctor to get antibiotics. Four doctors later, she finally got what she was looking for. Demerol (pethidine). She just shopped around doctors and dentists, with different stories, until she found one willing to give her what she wanted.

I don't judge the addicts but I do judge the many 'enablers' who benefit in some way from the sale of prescription drugs.

When it comes to our health we need to make sure we understand exactly what we are putting into our bodies. Drugs of any description are serious business. Our health and the quality of our life are serious business. However, we also need to be aware that for some parties, keeping people ill and addicted is also serious business.

Sometimes we lose sight of the fact that doctors are running businesses and some are not as ethical as they should be. We also lose sight of the fact that pharmaceutical company advertising is promoting illness as opposed just the drugs. More and more healthy people are now being defined as 'sick.' The strategies have many components — the most visible being TV and newspaper ads that make us think that our ailments and inconveniences are the signs and symptoms of genuine medical conditions. A sore stomach is “Irritable Bowel Syndrome,” a mild sexual difficulty is “Female Sexual Dysfunction,” and overactive grown-ups now have “Adult Attention Deficit Disorder.”

Be alert not alarmed. And for those people who are interested in reading about the relationship between drug companies and the medical profession, read this or this. It's a fascinating business which sometimes seems to focus more on the money to be made than the quality of human life.

Afterglow

It's my favourite time of day.

A very cool sunset in the last month of winter.

Except from tomorrow I have to get acquainted with sunrise.

I haven't laid eyes on her for years.

I momentarily lost my mind and agreed to exercise for the next 3 months.

It's supposedly for a good cause. Me.

I was inspired by our Prime Minister's 51 year old wife who just climbed some exotic mountain top after training for months with an SAS type person.

Then along comes pictures of Cindy Crawford kicking back on a boat in St Tropez looking like that at 43.

I nearly changed my mind. Cindy has the secret of youth. And it apparently doesn't involve chasing it.

Cindy says the secret to her great body is HAPPINESS.

Eating cupcakes makes me really happy. And I bet working out for hours a day makes her really happy.

Tough call. More cupcakes or more exercise?

I better get some sleep, and if you hear the groans and whinging about six hours from now just be thankful you don't live closer.......

Whatever you do this weekend, may it make you really, really happy because now we all know that happiness will give us a body just like Cindys......it's decent of her to share her secrets really.....for all the ******* good it's going to do the rest of us.

Bill's given me an idea...

Regardless of your political views, you have to admit that Bill Clinton did some good.

He's solved a thorny problem in helping to liberate the two American journalists who either strayed into North Korean territory by mistake or were seized in China by border guards.

The man has it. Charm in bucket loads.

I guess our best attributes can often prove to be our worst attributes.

Bill's success has got me thinking. Granted, a little more laterally than I possibly should be before my evening glass of wine, but bear with me.

I am now wondering why Governments don't use 'really special people' as magic bullets to solve the world's problems.

And by "really special people", I don't mean ex Presidents. I mean white collar psychopaths. You know the human predators who look less like Charles Manson and more like Bernie Madoff.

Bernie seemed trustworthy enough. However, he single handedly changed the lives of hundreds of thousands of people in an extremely evil way. He is grandiose, exploitative, arrogant, charming, callous, immoral, superficial, deceitful, non emotional and manipulative. Just the qualities needed to become a special international troubleshooter in some far flung terrorist haven.

Personally, I cannot see the point of Bernie languishing in gaol for the rest of his days loitering around the prison library or taking woodwork classes. Why doesn't the American Government make him earn his keep and truly pay for his crimes? He is a Master Manipulator who must have an incredible mind. Could his 'skills' be used for good instead of evil?

Send him to the Middle East. China. Korea. Afghanistan. Better still, drop him in the remote mountains of Pakistan with enough food for 30 days and let him use those incredible powers of persuasion to find Osama bin Laden's cave (if he is alive, Bernie will 'con' someone to get the facts I am sure and persuade OBL to show his face).

What's the risk? It takes a sociopath to understand how the minds of other sociopaths work. They can be used as freelancers to deflect or solve crises. If we lose a few of them, in the more remote parts of the world, so be it.

OK, it may be too much of a risk having pathologically disordered folks flying the flag (then again we've had them running countries), but I think it's worth one of those ROI government trials at least.

I think I'll write to Obama about Osama and Bernie. Then I might have that drink and see where my thoughts take me. Yes, you are right, you probably have every reason to be worried....
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On another note I had to show you a few photos my nieces took of my favourite city in the world, New York. I am so tempted to sign up for BlogHer 10 just because of next years venue. Anyway, I was downloading the images and all was going well until the final one popped up. WTF? Does anyone recognise this part of the New York landscape? I am not sure if its the Bald American Eagle or whether the light on this gentleman's bald sport blinded the little photographers while they were taking a photo of another landmark. If you live in New York and recognise this 'bald landscape' let me know.

Giving concrete form to the intangible

Friend: Have you ever thought that it's a little strange?
Me: What?
Friend: Having that many journals. What is with that?
Me: Well I never thought it was strange until you mentioned it....

So, how strange is it?

I've always been a person that plans, makes lists and jots down my thoughts. As a child I kept diaries, wrote suspect poetry, short stories and secret wishes. I still do. Except for the poetry bit, anyway.

These days I like to keep different aspects of my life in different journals. So I have a journal for blogging ideas, then one for business, one for my book, then one for personal plans, creative pursuits etc.

I even include artwork and cuttings from magazines and newspapers. I guess I could keep a large journal and compartmentalise it but I prefer smaller and more compact journals. I even select the journal appropriate to the purpose. Classic black for business use, and bright for something creative etc.

I tie it all together with one overall To Do list that I update often.

Given I have a Type A personality I concede it was probably a big mistake when some years ago I did Time Management and Project Management courses in the same week. I may have created a monster.

And now that I am part of the bloggerazzi set, my need to journal has exacerbated. I make notes all the time (and rarely use any of them) all with a view to weaving the quotes, expressions, stories, jokes into a post at some point in time.

So, what about you.

Do you keep journals? How do you organise your blogging ideas or posts?

Au Naturale Injections

Dear Women of a Certain Age

The whole cosmetic surgery issue is a tricky one. On the one hand, I've told my friends to slap me and pass me a big fat can of Get Over Yourself if I ever consider getting surgery.

On the other hand, if I suffered trauma or illness that required surgery to restore what I once had, I would not hesitate.

HOWEVER, if I do 'get work', you can be sure I won't be lying about it.

As a makeup artist, I have to know what I can use on a client's skin because there are so many things people are having done these days. It's a duty of care issue. So why is it that so many women sit there, get all coy and lie about having had ‘work’? Why can't they admit it? Are they ashamed? Do they think they will be judged?

When I see someone who is faking it, and it happens a lot, I want to quietly say, "I know. It’s ok."

So to the 45 year old who sat there with her frozen face and used Nicole Kidman's line of "I am all natural. I stay out of the sun, eat healthily and have good genes", I say, Get. Over. Yourself. It's ok to do whatever you like if it makes you feel better about yourself. There is nothing to be ashamed of. I just want to put the best product on your face, that's all.

It's no wonder the average woman is shooting for unattainable beauty if there is so much denial out there. The majority of celebrities, at least here, are having non-invasive procedures such as botox, plasma and microdermabrasion all the time. And many will progress to plastic surgery which is pretty risky business when you see the results up close. That’s the reality and its not always a level playing field for the rest of us looking at these women from afar unless you have the wherewithal to keep up with them that is.

And when you know that, you can go back to running your own race in whatever way you want. Without the pressure of thinking 40, 50, 60 and beyond is meant to look a certain way. It's meant to look the way you want it to look. No pressure. No shame. Regardless of your choices.

And for those who are not so keen or cannot afford to get injected, pulled, peeled and prodded here are some makeup tips:
- Wear more blush to give dull skin a boost.
- Never use beige or pink-based foundation. This will suck the warmth out of your skin.
- Don't over-pluck your eyebrows. This will accentuate eyelids which tend to become fuller and droopier as you age.
- Match your brow colour to your hair colour.
- Don't go overboard on eyeliner under the eye. Use it on the top to get some lift.
- Avoid frosty or shimmery eye shadow. This will make skin look crepey. Go for matte shading colours like browns and black for shape and definition. And blend well.
- Don't forget your décolletage. This area shows some of the most aging so don't stop your make-up at your neck. Apply a soft wash of foundation to the area.
- Avoid dark lipstick. As you age your lips sag and are more lined and harsh. Try softer colours.
- Go easy on the lip gloss. This will make lipstick bleed and emphasise lines. Use it only in the centre of your lip to make your mouth look fuller and rounder.
- If you wear glasses eyelash extensions will give eyes a boost.
- Only ever use one product under your foundation. Adding too many will make your skin oily and the makeup cakey.

UPDATE: Now they say you should get rid of your long hair when you are middleaged. My daughter came home this weekend and this morning she agreed to give my hair a trim. I trusted her. Or did. She cut inches off so now my hair is kind of just above my shoulders but still long enough to put up thank God. I would post a picture but I am still crying lol!!! So as my final tip, I want to tell you that lawyers don't make good hairdressers and the word 'trim'means different things to different people. And there is a reason we should put ourselves in the hands of professionals. Good job I am not too attached to anything really. Hair grows.
Image: collage of my own makeup art