Sunday 1 March 2009

Some children do have 'em!


Shhh, I have to say this really quickly while my daughter is recuperating from a busy weekend. I know for a fact her eyes will not be able to focus long enough on the computer screen to read this so here goes.

Mothers stay your mothers the rest of their life. And their interfering ways may only get worse the older they and their children get.

My daughter and I have a great relationship although, as I've already told you, I’m worse than a Jewish mother. Even though my daughter lives on the opposite side of the country, we talk often. I have been known to cross the line into the realms of over the top mothering every now and then. I could kick myself in the shins when I find myself talking to her as if she was 5. It just slips out and then I hear her groan. It's mainly about inane stuff. The other day she said she was going on a long walk and before I could help it I said, "don't forget your hat, sunglasses and sun block as the sun is really bad for your skin and you will get wrinkles". Yes really! She reminds me how old she is, I put my finger in my ear, choose to ignore and then change the subject. I have no excuse as my mother was never like that. Even when I was 12.

I now know that I'm not alone. And it makes me smile in a wicked way.

I just read about a Mother who is way more embarrassing, way more opinionated and way more public in her views about her children than I could ever be.

And the woman in question is Dame Elizabeth Murdoch. Rupert Murdoch’s 100 year old mother.

It’s hard to imagine that the 77 year old media tycoon actually has a mother. He was described by Michael Wolff in his book, The Man who owns the News as "a manipulative bastard who believes in nothing except himself and his company, and eventually double-crosses almost everyone”.

Rupert may use his media to further his political and business objectives and to attack his enemies but it seems his mother uses the media to give her son ‘what for’. It made me laugh out loud!

The whole Murdoch family is in Australia to celebrate Dame Elizabeth's birthday. In an interview published in the press, she said she is still upset that Rupert left his second wife of 32 years for his current wife who is 38 years his junior. She said the only dark shadow on her birthday will be that she will have to keep Rupert and his former wife away from each other during the celebrations. She believes her son's actions are an affront to the morals and values she holds and had hoped to instill in her children. While it was unfortunate that he was unhappy in his marriage, she feels he should have kept the commitment he made to his former wife.

She also said that she detests materialism and doesn’t admire her son for having a vast fortune but only for being a good and loving person. She disapproves of anyone flaunting their wealth and refuses to get central heating in her home. Goodness knows what she thinks of Murdoch’s $44 million New York apartment then.

Apparently when Rupert bought the British trashy tabloid News of the World, she told him she didn't approve at all and that what they published was intruding into people's privacy. He apparently told her that lots of people have very empty lives and want something entertaining to read. She told him that she "would like to think otherwise, but he didn't change his mind."

Perhaps Rupert Murdoch can control the press, but there is no way in hell he can control his mother. I love it!! I would like to be a fly on the wall at his mother’s party because as far as she is concerned Rupert is still wearing shorts and long socks, ha ha. I wonder how many times she will send him to his room.

So tell me, what is or was your mother like? Or maybe what are you like as a mother? One of those hands off mothers like I have or one of those opinionated mothers full of good advice sort of, kind of, maybe, like me or could she even be like Dame Elizabeth Murdoch where she is happy to spill the family secrets to the world?

Note: Anyone who is pictured with me in the above photo taken in Thailand last year is not allowed to comment thank you. Besides, you should be making more constructive use of your time rather than wasting it on the Internet commenting on blogs.

64 comments:

  1. So here I am wasting a perfectly good 15 minutes on a Sunday morning, but having a heck of a time doing it! :)

    This issue been on my mind a little bit these past few weeks - my mother is the smart parent, with an EQ off the charts. I'm the stubborn, thick-headed kind. Waiting for her genes to rub off on me any minute now.

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  2. Love the note at the end, Lilly! This is golden. I could totally picture Rupert's mom giving him a 77-year old "time out." "You've been a bad, bad, GREEDY boy! Now, go to your room and don't come out until I say so!" Of course, the rule is one minute for every year. So, a five-year old should stay for five minutes. An hour and 17 minutes is a damn long time to be staring at a wall. I bet he'd learn or thing or two in that amount of time!

    My mom is the best mom on earth. She used to give "advice" whenever the mood struck. Now, for the most part, she waits to be asked. Her advice is always right on the money. (Rupert would be proud.)

    Me? I'm a laid-back hippie. I (try to) keep track of the comings and goings of my two teenage boys, but that's like trying to keep track of how W got us into like a gazillion dollars in debt or figuring out how one idiot mom could think it's OK to have a gaggle of eight babies. I walk the fine line between parent and friend. Only time will tell...

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  3. Oh, yeah - two more things. Your daughter is as beautiful as her mom, and what were Rupert and mom doing in the bathroom together? Please don't tell me she's still helping him out in that department...;-)

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  4. In an age , when giving children so much freedom was adversely commented on, my mother gave it to me, but ensured that I was aware of its value. She never did this thing too much about "dont go out in the sun" type stuff (not that we have a choice here), but I do that with my daughter too. But even when she was 80+ and her children were 60+ and getting there, there was a sense of authority and fearlessness, and truth about her. Her grandchildren got away with all kinds of stuff, including cribbing about me. :-)

    But I think Murdoch needs to have someone like his mother around; and I am so glad she is telling him off....

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  5. Hey! Your daughter looks soo much like you!! And, you could pass off as her elder sis!!
    My mom does keep telling me about the sunblock thing and 'maybe you could put a little lipstick on, you'll look nice" but she isn't someone who will nag, so I am pretty happy with that! If she didn't even talk about sunblock, I would worry!!

    I thought I would give my sons more independence but I find myself catching them by the scruff of their necks and slathering sunblock on them....

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  6. Awww Lilly you're alright. Every mother has that effect on their child, it's called LOVE!
    Love the footnote at the end. sounds like something that I would say to my eldest who is sixteen now and love being on the computer!
    Have a good one.

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  7. What a great topic. something to bring back for mother's day! I like Dame Elizabeth, likely a big reason for Murdoch's success.

    I have a strong, but not overbearing mother, and I'm one of those opinionated ones!

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  8. Beautiful picture of you and your daughter, both of you are so stunningly beautiful.

    I have a hands on mama too. She still yells at me to tell her where I'm going and when I will be back and just who is it I am going with.(ummm same person for 34 years derfina) I won't even get out the drive way before my cell phone is ringing. But it is all done in the name of I am your Mother and it's my right and job. (I'm 48 last I checked)
    But this woman has made more sacifices for her children and love ones. (check out my 2 post yesterday,she's a trooper)
    Wouldn't trade her for the world...she is my world! We laugh all day long..and it is usually at each other.

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  9. Can you tell my son to read this so he doesn't think he has the only "hands on" mom around???

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  10. Ah Lilly, thank you so much, as a resident of New York City, it was good to hear that Rupert was not born in a test tube from the Dark Side. He has a mother he can't control who truly disapproves. Hallelujah! Now if you would only say a few words about Donald Trump....

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  11. Lilly;

    You and your daughter are so beautiful. Great picture.
    I think my three children would say that I'm a opinionated Mom. I hear them say.."i know Mom" I will Mom...OK MOM a lot. I back off nicely I think and give them space, at least that's what they tell me.
    Now that she' They make their own decisions and they make their own mistakes.
    My Mom on the other hand never liked confrontation herself, but she was always telling me "you tell him this" and "you call them and say this" and "you take that back and demand a refund"
    These days she does confront people and not so nicely. Tisk!

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  12. My mother is the exact opposite of how I am with my girls. She was very apathetic and I´m NOT! :)
    I am like you, I tell them what to do and what I think they should do even with thousands of km. between us. Sometimes I can restrain myself, but it´s damm hard!
    You look so lovely in the pic with your daughter!!

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  13. First of all, Lilly... I have to reiterate what everybody else has said. You're both gorgeous! How do you do it? You seriously look like sisters. Your lucky daughter has some great genes. I'm mean really. Stunning!

    OK OK.... mothers...?

    I'm like you. And I'm like my mother. Yup! We're all into our daughter's lives and opionionated as well.

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  14. Lilly, Lilly ... I am going to have to ponder this mother/daughter thing a little while before responding ... but did want to tell you and daughter how lovely you both are!

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  15. Oh, Dame Elizabeth sounds like such a hoot--I want to party with her!

    Your daughter looks just like you--you're both so beautiful!

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  16. Of course, I agree with everyone, you and your daughter are beautiful. And Rupert is an ass! His mom sounds great though! Hope you had a good weekend!

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  18. Outstanding !!! Gotta Love Rupert Murdoch's mother for telling it like it is ! Nobody better than that to call him on his b.s. and make it public too, which shows you WHO he is compared to his P.R. !

    My Mother was a monster. A quiet one. My father was viciously abusive, and she couldn't have cared less - as long as it wasn't her turn that day/week to get the abuse.
    It was a nightmare.
    She NEVER protected us, not once - and even defended him, saying we needed to understand him...
    He introduced me to the man who date-raped and sodomized me when I was 18. And then refused to press charges because he said it would embarrass him among his country club friends.

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  19. I'm so glad to know that Rupert's mother gives him hell regularly!

    He deserves it!

    My stepmom gave me hell when I needed it, but gave others hell if they said anything bad about me.

    Great post,and terrific pics.

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  20. Lilly. It is great that you and your daughter have such a warm and loving relationship. You both look great in the photo! Isn’t it a mother’s privilege always to interfere (teasing)... and I just loved your endnote to your daughter (lol)... I hope she comments!

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  21. I try to be one of those moms who waits for my daughter to approach for advice, but every now and then my insanity takes over and I just give it. :)

    We talk very openly, so I hope we stay on that course.

    Great Topic Lilly!

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  22. My Mama, is truly one of a kind.

    The consummate Italian Mama, full of guilt giving words and over the top antics to make you forget she just did something heinous.

    God...it was a fun life!

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  23. First off, because he is such a jerk, I feel it is okay to say: "Holy shit! He looks older than his 100 year old mother!"

    My parents and I were actually talking about this yesterday. They were so clued out as parents! They are still finding out about the stuff we were getting away with. I told my mom that the fact that my friends all wanted to come over and thought my parents were so cool was because we were allowed to do whatever the heck we wanted. She hung her head a bit at that one.

    We didn't have a whole lot of guidance, but we did have fun! lol

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  24. You have a beautiful daughter, Lilly :) She looks just like you! Don't you love that?

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  25. Actually, my mother kept her nose out of our lives. I did find out, however, that the entire time I was dating Kevin, form the time I was 16 until I was 21, my mother said a novena every single night that we would break up. When we finally did, she said novenas of thanksgiving!

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  26. I am the mother that sometimes opens her mouth and inserts her foot where my children are concerned. I still see them as my children instead of grown up adults. My son is going to be 41 and the twins 31 this year. Like your daughter, they all remind me often of their ages and that they are capable of taking care of themselves. The funny thing about it is that they all love to come visit and be pampered by "Mom", eat meals and be waited on just like when they were still young and at home.

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  27. I love this post! I love that wise cracking mom of rupert!

    for me, well my childhood wasnt good so basically I dont have a mom that i have a relationship with. BUT...I hope I am a pain in the butt to my 5 children and now my 3 grandaughters. I love picking and lecturing my kids! But I also love helping them and making them laugh.

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  28. Well, Lilly, my mother is dead now. We were totally estranged for five or six years before and then during her death. I kind of saw her in a one sided way in those years and I still believe I was better off pretending to be an orphan.

    Interestingly though, in these many years since her death, I'm remembering the good times with her more than the awful years. I was talking to my best friend from high school on the phone last week (we haven't talked in at least 20 years) and she kept reminding me about fun things mom did. She loved my mother. I guess it's like having a baby....as they say, after enough time passes you forget the pain. That's not such a bad policy, you know? Makes for a much more serene present when you edit the past.

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  29. My mother was very tough and loving and I used to climb out of doors and windows to get away. She has mellowed over the years and I now regret the fact that I don't live near her. I came of age during the contentious late 60s and 79s. Even thought she didn't like it, she took me to get my long hair cut into an afro before I left for college because she knew I was going to do it any way.
    The Gemini that I am had my hands full with a strong-willed Scorpio daughter (and a milder Virgo son). I was a very hands-on mother who raised two independent and productive children. I veered between giving them responsibility and being flexible. I believe in structure and discipline because I think it provides security. More than anything, I spent a lot of time "loving up" my children, I was their parent not their friend until they "got grown." Now, they are important friends to me.
    (If you Mom doesn't try to protect you, advise you - who will?) I give advice, sometimes even asking if they want it first, then I let it go and pray that whatever their dealing with works well.

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  30. You and your daughter honestly look like twins...

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  31. I love the new blog look!

    I parent so different than my mother. Clearly I felt I was parented okay, i turned out half decent, but I mother so different than my mom did. We are as different as night and day.

    is it the new era, the fact I have so many, the ones with special needs? I am just not sure. I read this post first thing this morning, and I have been thinking about it all day. I am just not sure what I think about it all.

    i love how you can do that to me. Throw out a post and make me wonder about it all day long, as if I don't have anything else to think about! :)

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  32. @ Sujatha - Oh an EQ, mmmm lucky. Sometimes things skip generations so more than likely your kids will have the same. In the mean time you will do it well, I bet.

    @ Debra - I know I kept Ruper's mom giving him a dressing down too! Your Mom sounds great and a I bet your laid back parenting is making for more chilled out children. good on you. I am anxious to find out how your performance went.

    @ Ugich - my grandmother, Des' mother was a real matriarch too. She ran the family while alive and died in her 90s. Reminds me of Dame Elizabeth. Amazing and strong women.

    @ Roshni, oh thanks but thats what black and white photos do for you. Hide your imperfections. Sounds like you are just like your Mom.

    @ Bibi - mmm the computer is a big time occupier but my daughter doesnt have that much time for it really. You get lots of practice with your beautiful family too!

    @ Rebecca - thanks for the compliment, he he.

    @ Christine - the Dame married Ruperts dad when she was 19 and he was 42. He was already a successful media person in Oz. Rupert just capitalised on his father's wealth many times over. He has a far worse reputation though and is pretty lethal in business. Supposedly.

    @ Darsden - it sounds like you have a great relationship with your Mom which is fantastic. It's nice to hear these stories.

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  33. Wow, beautiful mom and daughter photo, love it! My husband calls me by my mother's name when whenever I get embarrassingly close to being too much like her! Yes, mom calls to be sure I shut the curling off, even when I haven't used one in almost 15 years! Yikes :) That's dedication.

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  34. every chance my daughter gets she says"if it's not one thing....it's my mother.".....
    I don't talk about my mother..

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  35. That is a terrific photo of you and your daughter. You are both very beautiful. I wonder, did you pick that particular one because you are behind her, supporting her and whispering into her ear: "say cheese sweetheart so we can get a lovely photo...and I'll buy you an icecream!"?

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  36. Hi Lilly,
    You should post more often...! 1 post every other day is not often enough for me. You are good. How do you make every one laugh ?
    While reading this post late last night, I was getting ready to comment, and then I read the last few lines. Just could'nt help chuckling...! So I thought 'let me read once again what this amazing lady writes about herself on her profile. So I went back to your cpmlete profile; and trust me it was past 1.00 am and there I was shaking with laughter reading the bit about excercise, and how you avoid it whenever you know the urge is coming on. Oh so funny...!
    I wish I could make people laugh the way you do. Sigh.
    ok so now to your post: your daughter is beautiful. And if she has her mom's wit, I would like to welcome her to blogging world. Seriously you cannot deprive this blogosphere if a 'chip of the old block' he he.

    I am a mother of grown up daughters. In their opinion I am a good blend of overbearing and chilled out mom.
    I try my best to stay bonded with them almost always, and do give them their space. That way I am shrewdly aware of all that is going on in their lives. If I come across something grossly unacceptable, then I let them know how I feel. if that dont work then I put my foot down, and even if that dont work, I accept life as it comes. sadly though.
    I believe that I am a moderate, modern, mom. In her own way my own mom was quite similar...!

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  37. @ Julie - of course you can, he needs to know he is NOT ALONE!!!!!

    @ Maureen - he he, you made me smile with your comment. No, surely the Don doesn't have a mother because if he did SURELY she would have told him to do something with hair of his!!

    @ Peggy, loved your comment nice to know I am similar to you by the sound of it. Funny about your mother. I think we get more straighfroward the older we get....mmmm heaven help everyone!

    @ Betty - thanks, well that's interesting because I am unlike my mother too. Maybe its because my daughter is an only child but then again maybe not.

    @ Kay - sunblock Kay, that's the trick! He he seems like mothers are meat to be opinionated. And I bet all of us started by saying we would never be like our mothers in some regards too!

    @ Helen - thank you Helen - yes it is a bit of question isnt it?

    @ Linda Lou - well you knw what its like - thank you, you and your daughter are so alike and gorgeous too. We are lucky we are mothers I think!!

    @ Sylvia - yes Rupert is a rich ass and his Mom is very rich too but very philathranpic (sp?).

    @ Loving Annie - its so hard isnt trying to understand why our parents are like they are. Your mother must have been codependent and after living with an abusive partner myself I know what it does to your morale and the fear you live in. I didnt have young children around at the time though and I cannot imagine. You are a beautiful soul and I am glad you came out the other side stronger and empathetic. Take care and thank you for your comment.

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  39. Rupert Murdoch so came from a test tube surely and I agree with whomever said this - his mother looks 30 years younger than him!

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  40. i've always thought that my mom has been overprotective in raising me but I know that she's just being a loving mother. Sometimes she acts like you Lily, and forgets that I'm not a 12 year old anymore. But my mom is so hard-working and generous that I would love to be like her (in most ways) when i get to be a a mom too someday. hey, that Rupert's mom rocks!

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  41. Love the new template. Poor Rupert, but way to go mom, tell it like it is. Luckily Mother does not interfere at all, just shows support and love all the time. Yep I'm SPOILED.

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  42. I do the "over-mother" thing with my kids all the time...even though they are all grown up...28, 26, 25 I still think they need me to look after them. My daughter has been known to hang up on me when I start into my mothermode! They all live far away so I have to mother on the phone...but it certainly doesn't stop me...or even slow me down! My own mother does it too...so I can blame her for the tainted DNA lol

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  43. I am and will probably always be an over the top mother. Can't help it.

    Rupert's mom. LOL. That's hilarious. I love it.

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  44. The smiles exude happiness and the eyes scream of pure and perfect love. That is a wonderful photo.

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  45. She refuses to get Central Heating?
    Now, that is an amazing woman. She could probably have anything she wants, but she doesn't want it.

    I love your new blog look! It's very "you". :)

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  46. What a great read! And what a cool mum that dame is...

    I'm a mother hen - hands-on, always there, but try not to spoil.

    My mum is very quiet - and was strict when we were growing up. Now she is a very patient and wonderful grandmother.

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  47. Oh, Jiminy crickets...I just returned from my daughter's graduation from the Air Force basic military training.

    I had to tell her that I knew she was completely able to take care of herself (hello...gas masks, guns, mean instructors, etc.) but that it was really difficult for me not to remind her to do this or that.

    Does it EVER go away?

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  48. Lilly - what a lovely photo of you and your daughter.

    Which one is you?!

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  49. Rupert is not a nice man. Have you noticed two of his three children have left his Company. Of course he has given them millions to play with over the years so its not like they need to work at all. And what is with his hair. Does he go to the same hairdresser as Donald Trump. There is a strange red tinge happening.

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  50. Lils ... My mother is a one-of-a-kind sort. As you know, she is extremely artistic. I think her art helps maintain her high strung nature. Growing up with her, you knew exactly where you stood, second by second. And there was no gray in between with her, only black & white. This was factored in from her strict, Catholic upbringing. She taught us all to work hard. There was little slacking off in our household. Saturday mornings were "chore day". We have to polish all the furniture, sweep, clean the bathroom - you know, fun stuff like that! Sundays we'd help around the yard. She is a good mother and took interest in our lives. I could walk out into her art room while she painted and talk to her about anything - some of our best talks were there actually. Now, she has her own boutique custom floral and gift shop which I rallied family members to clear out for her. She's an excellent cook and I ALWAYS looked forward to dinner -- I still do! She's not overly affectionate as mom's go, yet is very loving and has been a consistent mother who taught us how to be good people. For the most part, we are, I am the black sheep! ha! Most families have one right? We butt heads because we are both highly emotional women. And since she was and is very vocal with us, I don't hold back on my opinions either. She's not nosey at all, but she doesn't have to be, since I don't hold back, she knows EVERYTHING! She doesn't meddle which is very good of her. But, YES, she tells me what to do ALL THE TIME. She even changed my Christmas dinner menu last year while I fumed inside. We discuss our differences when needed - I think it's just her high energy that makes it hard for her to keep her mouth in check. Seriously. lol ... But I wouldn't trade her for anything. I cried last year when I gave her a hug and felt how frail she is becoming {osteoporosis} even though she is still a very active woman. She hugged me while I cried ... She said, "I know, honey ..."

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  51. This is a great story! Love that Rupert's mum does not take any crap from him and that she puts him in his place.
    My mom was a wonderful woman who had her mind set in many ways however was always open and loving to all who entered her life. She was a short woman whom I surpassed in height early on. She would often say that she would step on my toes till my eyeballs popped out if I did not do as she said. She was great and I miss her in many ways.

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  52. I loved JULS comment and its a shame her Mother cannot read that. Those of us with great mothers are lucky. We are lucky that they care enough.We should tell them so often.

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  53. My mom died when I was 20, and now, 35 years later, I still miss her. She was funny, and smart and a very clear thinker. She used to say, "I enjoy you," to me, which let me know that she valued my company, not just because she was my mom, but because I'm an interesting person. What a wonderful gift!

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  54. Hi Lillyness! Oh, you funny thing! I think we Mothers just can't help ourselves. I bite my tongue sometimes when I'm talking to my children - 38 and 34! They're fully grown adults and I still think of them as little kids.:)
    Your daughter is pretty just like her mother. She looks like you!
    You've changed your blog dress too! So nice!
    be a sweetie,
    Shelia ;)

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  55. Is it not scary that the thing I got out of this was nothing about mothers, but the fact that my Dad actually DOES STILL ACTUALLY WEAR shorts and long socks. I find that disturbing.

    But I just have to say "Onya Mrs Murdoch! Keep him in line!"

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  56. Ohhh Lily! Your site is so pretty!

    ...that rhymes doesn't it? ;)

    I LOVE the new look. And this post just make me miss my mom. You sound like a great mom - I wish I could talk to mine as often as you do guys talk. Mine is in the other part of the world...*sigh*

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  57. Lilly, I love that phot of you and your daughter, I too have found the benefits of B&W photos, has made some "errr..no " photos into OK ones LOL

    Good to see Ruperts mum keeps him in line

    My mum doesn't interfere much...which can be good and bad... sometimes I would like to know she cares enought to interfere....

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  58. Go Mum!

    "Rupert left his second wife of 32 years for his current wife who is 38 years his junior."
    --ooh, what a creep. I se this in hollywood too where the woman who raised their kids and stuck by for 30 years as they ate lentil soup, getting by, for the guy to get discovered then finally dumps her for some bimbo. Think Harrison Ford. I have to admire Mel Gibson and Pierce Brosnan for their commitments when you know they must have has so many women throw themselves at them.

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  59. And, btw, there is no way you can have a daughter that old! Whoa.

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  60. Lily, that is a great picture of you and your daughter, she looks just like you, very pretty. I like that Rupert mum, I guess we will always look at our kids in a way they don't like. I know I think of my kids as my babies and always will. Thank you for stopping by and leaving those kind words. This was a great post.

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  61. Oh, Lilly, your daughter looks just like you, only with dark hair. And you're both beautiful.

    I live far from my mother when I married and didn't communicate much but through letters every now and then. Her advices were mostly "to always treat your husband properly that he will treat you well in return. Continue to serve God that God will bless you always."

    As a parent, I sometimes meddle with the way my son and his girlfriend care for their children. Nothing major. My daughter and I don't seem to talk much as mother and daughter, instead more as friends. I shall find out after she gets married and moves away to see if it changes.

    Tasha

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  62. As you know (I've written about it enough) my mother was really outstanding: Loving, super-intelligent and Very outgoing.

    but

    If anything remotely sexual appeared on the TV, she would tut and sigh and often get downright noisy about the whole thing...

    ...I learned very quickly to censor TV programmes...(if poss')

    ...How she had me, I'll never know.

    henry

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  63. @ Tasha and Soul Merlin - i only found these comments a bit late in the day. Reading your ocmment son your mothers leaves me in no doubt how you turned out to be such gorgeous people the pair of you.

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Thanks for your comments.