Saturday 1 November 2008

The Lingerie making an arse of itself

among other things.1. Arse-thetic, gorg-arse or ridicul-arse?

Lilly's Life isn’t normally seen as one of those kind of blogs although, judging from the search words some people use to get here, you would think otherwise. I have to tell you that according to my blog's Google stats there are a lot of people in the world who want to know how to have sex on a moving motorbike.

Cyril was one of them. He sent me an email about that particular post requesting more information. He had no luck. I am over the hill and the only kind of exercise that I am likely to have outside with the wind blowing through my hair is to drive with the car window open. I merely report the news Cyril, I don't necessarily live it.

So, at the risk of giving Cyril yet another thrill, and getting another email, I couldn’t resist posting this picture of what I consider to be the world’s most least erotic lingerie item ever.

This item, which is new to the market, is called the the Double-O Thong and its stated purpose is to lift your backside while flattening your stomach. Sounds good.

Except, look at IT!
What self respecting woman would be caught dead in this flesh-toned ensemble? Would you?

And moving from the ridiculous to the more seriously ridiculous.

2. “You, the little people, will be easy to 'smack down'” (no pun intended - it is a serious quote).
From a terrorist. And yes, he apparently is talking about us. In the West.

Six years ago Islamic militants, known as the Bali bombers, killed over 200 people in Bali, many of them Australians on holiday. Just another act of terrorism. On the eve of their executions by firing squad, the bombers have called for revenge against the West and have warned the US to expect defeat. One of the terrorists, said that every "fellow Muslim" needed to raise his hands "to offend the infidels [non-believers] that wronged the Muslims". This, he warned, would be the only way to stop "their cruelty to us".

I guess this is what you might expect from deranged killers. I guess they don't see that killing 200 innocent people was being cruel either. The mother of two of the bombers says her sons were right to kill non Muslims. "I don't cry. I leave it all to God," she said "I feel that killing them isn't a mistake because they don't pray."

Right, I am a mother who believes in God too. How does this kind of brainwashing happen? Are we just as brainwashed by our religions perhaps? Seriously, life is too hard to fathom sometimes.
In fact, sometimes I just want to curl up in bed and stay there.

3. A Great Bed-escape

And given I may be spending a lot of time under the covers given the news only seems to be getting worse, I have to show you this great bedscape (well I never knew about scapes before until I went to Shelia’s blog and saw her tablescape. I assume you can have a bedscape too).

So here it is - a display I saw in a store yesterday which has inspired me no end (click on the image to see those gorgeous cushions). I am going to try and do this myself. I think our beds are THE most important pieces of furniture in our homes and should be dressed accordingly.

4. Some things should be kept under the covers, Nicole!

And finally, I really feel the need to say this. For the good of a fellow Aussie. Nicole Kidman,
p-l-e-a-s-e STOP giving any more interviews because you are sounding more 'lame' with each one printed! I know you are happy but...

"And I think giving birth to a child, as a woman, is what we're born to do. "It's very bittersweet," Kidman told Parade magazine. "My relationship with death used to be far more ambivalent, I think, and now it's very much about staying in the world.” Nicole, you just had a baby you didn’t find a cure for cancer! You are starting to sound more and more like Tom with each passing day....how is that possible?

By the way, Des will be back on Monday – he is keeping his post top secret until I have to publish it for him. I am telling you if there are any more stories about me ....I’ll....I'll .... cry ....then laugh, no doubt.

Have great weekend!

44 comments:

  1. Those pants are terrifying looking. Who wants to wear pants that have your ass hanging out of them??

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  2. Wow! You've really been thinking about a lot of interesting things. As funny as those lingeries are.... you know... I could use some help with my larger tummy and my smaller behind.
    Oh my! I can't wait to read what Des has to say! He is wonderful.

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  3. I must admit that the pants are a real turn off and I always thought we all of us tried to replace pants before we got to the stage where our arse hung out of them.

    As to the rest, yes, I too sometimes despair of people and I think brainwashing is a feature of most religions (and politics too) to keep all their devotees "on message". Unfortunately, it has by far it's greatest effect on those who are intellectectually weak, or already nuts.

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  4. I just gained 3 kilos from eating all the ice cream I am making so I will just not look again at THAT underwear.

    My bedding looks like that as I just got all new from ebay. Yep, cushions and all!

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  5. i would not get caught wearing those knickers not even for a million bucks. yak. horrible. i won't comment on the terrorists, they're not worth it. the bed though, that's an entire diffrent story: i am a bed person (not something to brag about, i know), but i love my sleep and i agree with you on the bed being the most important piece of furniture. as for nicole, glad for her motherhood experience, but she should stick to its private side and not make it public. that's my take on it. missed you too, Lilly and can't wait to read some of Des's stuff.

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  6. Oh dear, NO but then again have you seen a lot of that body slimming underwear that around. It would be like getting dressed in PVC or something. How ridicul-ARSE is that! Not even sure Cyril could get turned on by that one.

    I am not sure about how people can justify killing by their religion. Muslims I know don't agree with it so I think once again people sue religions as an excuse. I dont agree with capital punishment normally but in this case those guys need the smiles wiped off theri face. I knew someone who got killed in Bali. Just so shocking.

    I love my bed too and I love trying out all new looks. Its a girly thing though, hey? I agree the bedroom is the most important place - for lots of reasons.

    Yes Nicole has lost a few brain cells of late. Everything is gushy, gushy sugar sweet sickening nonsense. It's from having too much botox I think. wow, she had a baby. Lovley but there is a few billion women who have done it before you love!

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  7. Hello Lilly .... bedscape - love the scape concept - I will be borrowing that one :)

    As for Nicole - am glad she is happy - but please enough is enough - if you want to go on like that you really need to start a blog Nicole .... isn't that what we all do when one wants to wax lyrical about ones child/ren and own perspective on experiences ...

    Yep the place for all that is a blog :) le

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  8. Terrifying knickers.=) At least going #2 won't be a problem.

    Terrifying words.
    Love your neighbor. Those are better ones.

    I'd love to coccoon myself up in my comforter for a day. My fsmily is dead set against that. =)

    Nicole is in the honeymoon stage of motherhood. I probably said some pretty off the wall stuff too ( though, not quite that off the wall)Thank Goodness I didn't have media outets recording my every word. I would probably spend the day cringing.*While helping move a friend I came across an old thank you for the baby gift card that I sent her. I read it and I swore those were not my words. WTF? it all goes back to your old writing while hormonal or emailing while drunk post a while back*

    If Nicole starts straying into Tom territory we are going to have to stage an intervention.

    Looking forward to Des.

    Peace - Rene

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  9. I can honestly say that I find those knickers very unattractive...but I'd say Cyril will be baaaaaack :)
    a blog for Nicole sounds like a fun idea....she could be a celebrity 'Mommy'...
    I'm sure we'd all love to know about her ins and outs in babyland...
    good luck with the cushions...I'm totally bereft of any dressmaking /sewing skills as my Mum got them all ..
    looking forward to reading Des's next post too...have a good Saturday night Lilly :)

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  10. those pants are pointless, just wear the regular tummy/bum tuckers and be done with it.

    Nicole kidman - bith is bittersweet??? In what way? gain a baby and loose bladder control bitterseet type thing??? Maybe shes trying to be like some of those other actors who think their opinion is important in some way...stick to entertainment thanks

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  11. Quite frankly Lilly that lingerie is sexy as all hell, on whom I am just not sure. No doubt they are counting on this being a best seller and I am sure we will see Jennifer Lopez or someone endorsing them soon enough.

    Amrozi and his friends deserve the death penalty. They have had an easy ride in prison and made lots of money though book deals. Disgusting and it must be horrible for the victims families. They show no repentance at all.

    Hadn't noticed what is on the bed I have to say, I just worry about who is in it lol!

    Well Nic has always been a little loopy for my liking, highly strung I bet but good luck to her with her child, she tried hard enough.

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  12. The worst part is, the model is skinny and possibly has quite a pert little bottom that doesn't need lifting. So if you think SHE looks ridiculous, my friend, wait til us normal gals clad our butts in those!!! LOL

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  13. Well, Lilly, I must say that the lingerie is what we in the male world might call a "mood ender". No more needs to be said, I think.

    AS for the alarming number of people wanting to know more about sex on a motorbike, I am very concerned because the sale of motorbikes here in the US has sky-rocketed since the price of gas went up so high. I knew we would start seeing a lot more accidents involving them, but I shudder to think of what I might see the next time I happen upon another accident involving a motorbike with two riders!!! Yikes!

    I do have a nice bed, I think, but I have never thought of my sleeping arrangements as a sanctuary of blissful escape and...wait, you never mentioned sleep, did you? Ok, never mind. lol

    I like your take on the terrorists. It truly is their own religion, or their particular brand of their religion, that blinds them to the freedoms of others to not agree with their terroristic viewpoints, and choose their own religions. Honestly, this is one reason the spread of Muslims into western cultures really scares me. They live their lives strictly according to their religious beliefs and the west is doing everything possible to banish any hint of Christianity from public airing, so we are becoming more and more a society of Godlessness. How is this arrangement ever going to work? (Sounds like a good topic for a post).

    Very interesting posy, Lilly. You made my mind work in over-drive on this one.

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  14. Looking forward to Des's next post. There must have been something in the tap water at Tom and Nicole's house. It just took longer for it to take effect in Nicole. Thank God their not together saying those things.

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  15. Oh. My. Stars. I could just imagine what my arse would look like. I just don't know if there would be room in those little windows for both cheeks. Perhaps I would have to cut the divider and then at least I'd have room for one...

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  16. Lots of interesting bits from you today, Lilly. Those Double-O thongs don't look so bad, it may be ingenious. Remember, no one knows you're wearing them, and if they do the trick... As long as they're comfortable and not too tight!

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  17. Lilly...you always make me smile! Funny post! Can't wait to see your bedding when you're done...the inspiration photo is awesome! Susan

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  18. Ha- where in the world do you find this stuff?! Oh, and I know about all the crazy searches people do. I get plenty of "naked desperate housewives" searches. Sometimes they actually stick around to0, despite the fact that there are no naked people whatsoever on my blog!

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  19. Crikey - bare bums, bombs, beds and babies! That's a very interesting mix Lilly.

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  20. Bare bums, bombs, beds and babies! An interesting mix of topics Lilly.

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  21. NIcole Kidman makes me laugh, she is sounding more like Tom!

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  22. Well, you can be sure I won't be ordering any of those panties, I'm another one who wouldn't want to have my ass hanging out -- certainly not at this stage of the game! I too, find it hard to comprehend the thinking of terrorists let alone parents that approve it. But now, that bed is a whole other thing! Beautiful! I may have to do something new with mine after looking at the pictures. Great post, thanks!

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  23. Just found your blog on A Day in Rhonda's Life.

    About the double thong thing: I'm just not feelin' it. And I'm not wearing it, either.

    Fun stuff.

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  24. That butt thong lifter thing...what is wrong with people??? Plain weird!

    Anyway, I have to chuckle at the comment you left on my blog...I am a Sag too...and how I ended up marrying a Virgo? The universe is always throwing us a curve ball! :)

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  25. blog cruising ... saw your comment next to mine at Eric's blog.

    Hello from SpeedyCat :-)

    You really close comments??? Cannot say I have ever wseen that before.

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  26. @ Riayn - terrifying alright but they are a serious product in the stores. Thanks for your comment.

    @ Kay - NO.....Kay you dont need these pants! Yes and I cant wait to hear what Des has to say either... I am a little nervous..

    @ CJw666 - oh that was funny - yes holes in your clothese would have been a bad thing once. I jsut feel incredibly past it when I see this stuff now...

    @ Leslie - you make me laugh - 3 kilos form all that ice cream. well you will ahve to send some my way. As for your bedding I am going to have to find your Ebay supplier. I have made linen before and when you think aobut it its not that hard.

    @ rocksnowhite - glad you stopped by. I love to catch up on your stories - the last one was the best by far. No, I dont think a young girl like you needs knickers like that anyway. Have a great weekend - it must be getting cold over your way!

    @ Sarah - you make me laugh so why dont you start your own blog. It would be too, too funny!

    @ le - You are so right, we need to suggest to our Nic that she starts a blog. Imagine having her on WTBAY.

    @ Rene - families are so inconvenient at times when it comes to sleeping in. Oh well!! Yes i should cut Nicole some slack but she is 41 not 10...

    @ Kim - now my mother has all the abilities too but I went to sewing classes. What a hoot that was! No linen is the best thing to sew - think about it there is not much to it except it is big. I have done a bit already and have loads of ideas, who knows, I was thinking aprons next. Thanks for dropping by and enjoy your Sunday!

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  27. OK you have to read this post on my blog:

    http://47andstartingover.blogspot.com/2008/08/ass-bra.html

    Of course I don't know how to make that a link, but it's in my August posts. It's quite similar to what's in your post here!!!

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  28. I can't say anything about those pants right now. I'm still laughing too hard. You are so right about Nicole Kidman, Lilly. I have not read the interviews, but from what you posted, I was ready to hurl! You are so right--she did not find the cure for cancer.

    Lastly, I would do anything for those bed pillows (well, almost anything, I guess).

    Great post.

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  29. @ Dee - you said it girl in a few words - those pants are pointless!

    @ Stefan - you crack me up - yes it may be more important who is in the bed tht what is on the bed. Good point. A girl can have it all didnt you know that?

    @ Braja - yes you are so right. I look like that, I so do I jsut never look in the mirror anymore and can you imagine getting into thsoe things you would need a special licence just trying to do it.

    @ Matt - Mood ender alright. Anyway there the new thing so get used to them and dont say I didnt warn you lol! Beds are blissful escapes for some of us. Sad but true! A sanctuary of sorts thats why they have to look great. Its a girl thing..so you should write a post on the whole Godlessness thing - you would do a better job than me on that!! Thanks for your comment. Always love them!

    @ Grandpa - Yes I think its Hollywood and huge million dollar movies that make our stars forget they are human at times. I think they act on their own time as well. Just an unreal life in every snse of the word I guess. Just like bloggers lol!

    @ Rhonda - you crack me up love your comment. I'll send you a pair to try but I am sure you will have them there...

    @ Christine - ok guess wht you are getting for Christmas??? He he

    @ Susan - yes I think that bedscape is divine - I love simplicity but a bit of glamour. I do not do patterns that well for some reason. I am going to have fun with this.

    @ Kate - where do I find this stuff - usually in the mainstream media. Mmm not sure what it says about us as a nation...thanks for dropping by. funny about your google search terms too!!

    @ Geri atric - oh yes, never thought about it like that - that woul dhave been a good title for this post. Thanks for dropping by and leaving a comment.

    @ Laura - she sounds pathetic, next she will jumping on couches on Oprah!

    @ Sylvia - not at any stage of the game really. Horrible things they are but so very popular apparently.

    @ Teri - oh I am thinking you would be feelin it if you were wearin it - he he. Thanks for dropping by. Have to love Rhonda - wicked sense of humor she has.

    @ Caroline - I just knew you were a Sag for some reason - there could be worse things - like being a Virgo.....

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  30. @ Gran - well if I have any luck in making them I will let you know. I am going to try the cushions first - decadent and totally impractical and non functional that they are - they describe me perectly..

    @ Julie - he he, I will be over to take a look. Great minds think alike!! See we are behind the times here, this gorgeous garb has probably just hit our shores.

    @ Speedy cat - yes on Sundays I close comments because I usually just post pictures and there is not a lot that people can say - give's people a break just to look. Thanks for dropping by. I love Eric's blog too!

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  31. Hi. How are you? It's nice to read your blog. Keep on working on it. So, I drop EC for you. Don't forget to Keep on Smiling. Salaam.

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  32. "My relationship with death used to be far more ambivalent, I think, and now it's very much about staying in the world.”

    Wow, I wonder how Bella & Connor feel after reading this kind of stuff. I guess they weren't important enough to make Nicole want to stay in the world. Shup up Nicole!

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  33. @ sofhal - thanks for visiting and the EC drop and leaving a comment.

    @ Megan - yes you hav etouched on somethign that is pretty important actually - what about her other children. They wouldnt be feeling so good about what she is saying either. I still think its interesting that you never see her with them. Possibly not her fault given Scientology but she probably should shut her mouth for the sake of her kids, you are right!

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  34. Love your blog!! Today's rose is beautiful!!!!

    Jeannie

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  35. Lilly, sorry I'm late as usual. I'm looking forward to Des's next post. Those knickers, ----UHM----LOL----- I just don't know what to say.

    As to the little terrorists, I like what someone else said, Their not worth commenting about. But they cause trouble everywhere. Brainwashing, I do believe you have a point there.

    Nicole, what is there to say?

    Love the looks of that "bedscape", mighty comfy looking indeed.

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  36. 1. That thing is hideous and degrating. But why can't I stop laughing? :)

    2. Religous extremists scare the heck out me too.

    3. Good luck with your project. It looks delightfully soft.

    4. I used to adore Nicole Kidman, but you are definitely right. She is beginning to sound a lot like present day Tom. Oh, and maybe if she didn't have a nanny in the picture, she'd come down to earth with the rest of us mothers. lol.

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  37. Hello to my dear friend across the miles. Well your blog gets awesome raves from this ol hillbilly from Kentucky. Lilly as i will say again you are a jewel in this internet blogging. This ol guy loves what you do on here. Stay the same because you made a friend here in Kentucky a few months ago. By the way my oldest daughter Meridith thinks you are stunning. And she ain't bad herself lol. Keep in touch
    Gary

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  38. Funny stuff! Great blog! Thanks for visiting me on my day at Sits! Come back again sometime!

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  39. So much great stuff in this post...it's like a grab bag of goodies. I AIN'T wearing that underwear...if something is gonna lift my tush it's gonna have to be a crane! And I wasn't aware that Nicole Kidman ever sounded smart lol. Have a great day!

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  40. That arse contraption is INTERESTING... lol!

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  41. Hello Lilly! Thank you so much for the comment! I am tickled you read my food blog!

    French Toast... my own recipe

    Good Crusty day old bread
    3 eggs
    1/2 cup milk
    2 tsp vanilla
    2 tbs grated orange peel

    Cut bread into 1/2 inch slices
    dip them in beaten egg mixture
    place them in a hot, lightly buttered pan and cook until lightly golden on both sides.

    Pour syrup and enjoy!

    P.S. It's Autumn here for me, and the rose is lovely! I love that it's spring for you!

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  42. Lilly, John's erectile dysfunction turned up on "Buried With Children," here:

    http://mimitchells.blogspot.com/2008/10/wtf-high-school-friends.html

    As I said, hitting women's sites is really an indication he's got the wrong end of the pineapple, eh what?!

    Looking fwd to the return of Dashing Des...quit holdin' out on us, man!

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  43. Lilly,

    You discussed a wide range of topics.
    Good for you!
    :=)
    I will focus what made me laugh which is the funny and strange undergarment!
    :)
    it looks so absurd it made me smile broadly! thanks!

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  44. Hello Lilly,

    I think I saw those pair advertised somewhere. They're suppose to make women's bums to look like Jennifer Lopez'.

    I'm sorry about your countrymen getting killed Bali. Plain senseless and vicious.

    Another great post from you. At least I don't have to wait for your Dad's post. I already read it and it's so good. You have to convince him to write his autobiography. He's a superb writer with lots of humour. You have his wits and talents, too.

    Tasha

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Thanks for your comments.